I'm working on a hook for my wannabenovel.
Let's see how this sounds:
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A young man with super-human abilities sets out to convince the girl he loves to allow her blood to be used to cure him of the madness that periodically overtakes him. Conflicts arise when a sinister organization kidnaps the girl for their own purpose. Her uncle's hatred and prejudice hinders his ability to cooperate with the young man to rescue the girl.
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I found it extremely difficult to leave out major details of the plot and reduce it to just a few words and I'm not quite happy with it.
On another topic:
I love the pictures so many people put into their blogs. I'll try my hand at inserting one.
It's of me and the Crooked Man at Oakland Fairyland. 
2 comments:
That's a very passive hook. To Be verbs are really not your friend. Passive sounds distant and boring. You want your hook to grab people by their throats.
I'd try again.
I see what you mean. I'll work on it. It sounded to trite and I couldn't work out why.
Thanks so much for the input.
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